Colin

Colin, I'm relieved that you're not leaving me in the dark or are out to be a prankster to underdog or try to humiliate me. I've had enough of those, and I am appreciative of the fact that you're being straightforward and mature with some things... I'm glad you think I'm cute and attractive. I keep your belly full?! Ha! You can somehow see me when I strip. awe. wink. Although I can get violent, I'm glad you find me to be cute. I don't like being called the psycho or savage one (when it comes from your opinion for now anyway). When I get violent, my violence has a purpose. Still angry about a lot of things... Not sure if anything will ever be to make of us, but I'm glad that I don't feel as alone with Jon's predatory stalking and harassment. I hate him more than words can describe. ... You're not always an easy person to follow and I don't always know how to take you or if you even are directing something at me. ... You would identify me as a "Falcon." You didn't like the American Woman song, and maybe you could be upset at the violently arrogant block Jon and Stacy are and you want to be the center of my attention? I hate feeling a paranoia and wonder of who's side you could be on. I know the way I have been severely wronged and lied about and I'm not taking back anything I've said against anyone. I don't believe you're Jon Hamm. Speaking of senators and arbitrage, I still get a little lost and confused with what could be your random people. Am I really talking to you? Are some people even made to be a senator for you? Besides you not always being easy to follow on your show, I'm not easily convinced of anything in the arbitrage either. You may have to either repeat what you said, or find other ways to say it, or other communication methods because I don't think we're always speaking the same language, or on the same page. .... In another arbitrage state of thought, I am hoping your wife is just her random self, and that you have no intention of ganging up on me in the capitalist arbitrage with other enemies or people I could know. I'm really hoping your wife is a random person to me that I know I don't know and who has never touched me. ..... That is all I have to say about all of those thoughts. I may have had something else to say or on my mind that I've yet to bring up, but for now, this is all that is fresh and prioritized in my mind.

Need more certainty

Oh Colin, where do I begin? I see some different signs and you're still mostly in my head. I am so seduced. Although I think I feel things, I wonder about you more than I know or believe. Are you really jealous of my crush on Chris Cornell? Is it that you honestly do get jealous or possessive or you're being pussy whipped and playing along with me for whatever reason? I find you to be a difficult truth to believe. ...... It feels like we move so fast with each other and it is hard to comprehend and I feel I live in two separate and questionable worlds. ..... I have some fear and it is the arbitrage and giving a kid a piece of candy. My biggest paranoia is with Chris Z. When we first crossed paths over a year ago, besides me thinking you're Jon, I also thought you had a share with Chris Z. I don't give him the credit now, and I know when I look at you, I really am looking at you. I'm just afraid of the credit that people give themselves. I may eventually have more feedback for Chris Z. and know I don't know everything about him, but he isn't my focal point right now............ Incase you haven't noticed Jon and Kim's creeper; I hate the terror that is in my life right now. They have always been the same violent deserving tyrant rapist nigger pigs. I know they think they win in their vanity but they just don't. I hate how suffocatingly vain they are. I don't want Jon in my life and I don't want to have to see, hear, or put up with him ever again. He is a severely sick and ridiculous mad man who knows no responsibility. I can't beat him off of me enough. ......... I don't want to talk about it anymore. I really don't have much else to talk about. I plan on lounging away the rest of this Sunday.